Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: This is Be Better Than youn BS with Resha Grint. And around here, we get rid of the BS game changing women, raw stories, real truth about what it takes to lead, win, and stay sane in the process. If you've ever had to fight for your seat at the table, this space is for you. This is now. Media, television, Life and business are about more than titles and wins. They're about how you show up and the culture you create around you. Sports taught me that early. Discipline, teamwork, and knowing how to pivot under pressure. And that's why I do this show. I'm Resha Grant, the people's champ, and I'm here to bring you real conversations with leaders, change makers, and everyday people who are shaping culture in powerful ways. Today's guest is the definition of power and precision. Bakita Poindexter is the CEO of Poindexter Consulting Group, a human resources powerhouse trusted by companies when the stakes are high. With over 30 years in the game, she's one of the leaders that they call to clean up chaos, coach executives, and create order where most people see crisis. She's not doing basic hr. She's building leadership that lasts. Welcome, Vakita. Thank you so much for being here.
[00:01:15] Speaker B: Thank you so much for having me. Thank you.
[00:01:18] Speaker A: Yeah, I'm so interested in this conversation, especially since I just found out you played basketball. So this is gonna be fun. Now, before we jump in, I'll start every conversation right here because let's be real, we all have some bs. So what BS did you have to break through to get where you are today?
[00:01:35] Speaker B: Self limiting beliefs, Right? Self limiting beliefs is the BS that I had to get past.
I had to first of all believe that I was capable, I was qualified, I had to build my confidence. And so that was the one area where I knew that if I didn't overcome those challenges, that it would prohibit me from excelling in anything, whether it's personally or in my career. So definitely self limiting beliefs.
[00:02:01] Speaker A: Did basketball help with that at all? Did sports help with that at all? Because I think that with people that play sports, there's a lot of things you got to get through. I mean, especially as you rise through the ranks, right? Because you can be that superstar in high school and then you get to college and you're way back, you know, way back on the bench and you gotta fight your way through it. Did sports help you with your self limiting?
[00:02:21] Speaker B: Not at all.
[00:02:22] Speaker A: Really?
[00:02:22] Speaker B: Not at all.
[00:02:24] Speaker A: I know.
[00:02:24] Speaker B: Which is ironic.
[00:02:25] Speaker A: It did not.
[00:02:26] Speaker B: So I play basketball as a way to Escape. Right. You know, I'm an only child. And so for me it was. We had just relocated from Texas to California. And so for me, it was trying to have that teamwork, that camaraderie, that sisterhood that I felt that I was lacking. And so. But it didn't help my self esteem, it didn't help my confidence.
So. No, absolutely it did not. And most people are like, well, that's ironic because typically it has the adverse effect, but for me it didn't.
[00:02:56] Speaker A: That is so interesting. Okay, well, you have built this powerhouse firm that companies trust when the stakes are highest. So I want you to take us back to the moment that made you decide to create your own lane instead of staying in someone else's.
[00:03:09] Speaker B: Yeah. You know, and it's ironic because I didn't make that decision. Right. You know, number one, I lead my life by faith. And so, you know, I have two, you know, beautiful children, adult children, a proud grandmother now. But my youngest son, who is 26, will be 27 in a few days, wasn't expected to live to be 10.
And so corporate America said, you have to be here and not, I couldn't telework. So there was no teleworking at the time. There were no opportunities. And anybody who knows me knows I'm a mama first. So I made to have. I had to make a really hard decision to say, okay, I need to be by my son's bedside. However, you know, I got a 401k, I got extra salary, and most importantly, I had the benefits. And so my vice president of legal at the time said, hey, have you ever decided? Have you ever thought about starting your own business? And that seed had been planted. But again, self limited beliefs didn't think that I was capable or qualified to do it.
And so he said, just help me, you know, find my replacement. I'll help you kind of get your legal pieces together and just go do it. And I was like, okay, now I'm a faith leaper by nature. And so I had to take that leap of a leap of faith because, you know, my son was in ICU 26 times. And so all I said was, I need a laptop and I can be able to do this. So there, in the midst of adversity, in the midst of challenges, birthed my firm.
[00:04:33] Speaker A: That sounds amazing. And there are so many people that birthed their firm and their entrepreneurship journey didn't come from this deep desire to be an entrepreneur, but to live the life that they need to live at that time.
And so there are a lot of people that aren't able to get through it, though. So what were the things that helped you to get through all of the challenges, especially with the baby who's in ICU that much to be able to get to success?
[00:04:59] Speaker B: Sure. Failure wasn't an option. Right. You know, as a mom, my kids depended on me. You know, at that season in my life, excuse me, everything kind of fell apart. You know, my marriage ended. I had one child that I still needed to provide a balance for. I had this, you know, my youngest, who fighting for his life. So failure for me wasn't an option. I had, you know, enormous, you know, medical bills and debt that I needed to pay for. I needed to get medication. So I didn't have a choice.
So I did what, you know, I think every mother would do by any means necessary. I worked hard. I networked laptop inside an icu, and I just figured it out. And as he got better and my business continued to grow, I just kind of shifted on how I was going to do things. Because at that point, I was in survival mode. Not, you know, not being an entrepreneur, not being a business owner. I was in survival mode.
[00:05:52] Speaker A: Gotcha.
[00:05:53] Speaker B: And so I had to pivot to get out of survival mode to get into a business mentality.
[00:05:57] Speaker A: So for all of the mothers or people out there that are dealing with seemingly insurmountable circumstances, what's something that they can do tomorrow?
It looks like, you know, I don't know how I'm gonna make it. I don't know how I'm gonna do this. And I know faith is one of those things. I believe we both lean heavily into that. But what's one of those practical things that that person can hear this conversation and say, okay, I can go do that.
[00:06:21] Speaker B: Number one, there's blessings in the midst of the chaos. Right? Everything happens for a reason. Don't try to look at what's going to happen five, ten years down the line. Look at how can you. How can you resolve the issues today? What is the obstacle or the challenge that you are dealing with today? Right? Because if you try to eat the whole pie, you're going to choke, right? It's going to. You're going to choke. You got to take it in slices and give yourself some grace.
You're not gonna be able to figure it out. You know, obviously, faith is huge. You know, have a small. I don't believe you need a large network of individuals that are gonna walk side by side with you, kind of hold your hand as you kind of navigate It. But number one, take it. Take it. Take it small. Take the small. Take it in small, incremental doses.
[00:07:04] Speaker A: Okay. Okay. Well, you have been in the HR game for decades.
So what's one lesson from your very first job that still guides you today?
[00:07:17] Speaker B: I think one of the one things that I learned early on in my career is your people are your greatest asset. If you take care of the people, they'll take care of the business. You know, initially, when I started my career, I worked for this organization that I still do business with today.
And that was their philosophy, right?
[00:07:32] Speaker A: They.
[00:07:32] Speaker B: They. They ingrained that in us. From an HR perspective, it was all about the people. And so. And I watched how they took care of their people, not just in the benefits and the pay, but just how they treat people. They treat their people like family. And we're talking about a large corporate organization. And so that was their philosophy. And so I have adopted that philosophy.
And that's how I run my business. That's how I try to teach my clients. If you take care of your people, they'll take care of the business. Because on the flip side of that, if you don't take care of your people, they'll shut down your business.
[00:08:06] Speaker A: And I really want to get into that a little bit, a little bit later in the interview, because I think what we're seeing in leadership right now is people, the people working in these companies feeling like they're not being taken care of. You know, we've seen such a huge shift in the world, and I think leadership is just really, really difficult right now. So I really want to get into that. But can you tell me how, with you having HR as a profession, I mean, literally just reading all the information about you and speaking to you, you turned it into a mission. So why is this so important to you personally?
[00:08:39] Speaker B: Because I was an employee.
Right. And, you know, I, you know, we kind of talked about my business was launched and was birthed out of adversity. And so I never forget where I came from or how I had to overcome that obstacle. And so for me, my number one, my business is my ministry. And so. And then number two is when you're talking about human resources, like, I'm not one of these individuals that have all these fancy titles. I'm not going to be chief people officer or, you know, chief this or chief that. I'm just going to be hr, because the first word in human resources is human. And I'm dealing with individuals that have feelings and emotions just like myself. And so I try to Deal with people from that humanity perspective, even in my leadership, even in my coaching, even in educating my clients in the training and development. And so that's my mission, is to make sure that people, leaders and organizations and CEOs and executives and everyone within the organization understand that you're dealing with human beings from the janitor to the CEO. I'm not going to treat the janitor any different than I treat the CEO.
[00:09:46] Speaker A: Right, Right.
[00:09:47] Speaker B: And part of the challenge that we're seeing today is we're very judgmental, we have our own personal agendas and we're forgetting that we're dealing with people that have feelings and emotions just like us.
[00:09:57] Speaker A: Exactly, exactly. Tell me how your faith has anchored your toughest moments. Because I'm a person. Like my words for this year was unshakable faith. And I feel like I've been tested in every single part of it because I feel like you, the things that you, that you work to manifest, those are the very things that God and universe, whatever you believe is going to take you through those things so that you can, so you can actually manifest them. So how has faith been an anchor for you?
[00:10:27] Speaker B: Well, it's the paramount in everything that I do. It's how I live my life, it is how I raise my children, it's how I run my business, it's how I deal with my staff, it's how I deal with my clients. I may not say God's name, but I will use godly principles. And when you have had to overcome the tremendous amount of adversity that I've had to go through and overcome, it is only by the grace of God. It's only by my faith that has gotten me there. Even when I'm in court doing expert witness testimonies. Right. You know, and I'm trying to decipher who did what, you know, who's right, who's wrong, you know, plan the mediator in between that it is my faith that I lean into one. I'm very mindful of what comes out of my mouth. Nothing negative comes out of my mouth. I don't care if I think it. I refuse to allow it to come out of my mouth because. Because I believe there's power in what you say to yourself. And so one of the things that I had to do in overcoming that self limited belief is leaning into my faith and reminding myself of who God says I am. So every day I have a ritual. I have a ritual, right. I have it posted in my office, I have it posted in my bathroom.
I'M very mindful of what I say to myself on a daily basis. I could care less what other people say about me. I'm more concerned with. Well, not more concerned. My only concern is what I say to myself. And I take godly principles and I. And I exercise that. So my faith is everything. Without it, I would not be here today.
[00:11:51] Speaker A: I love what you said because it reminds me so much of my mom and the things that she said to me about the things that come out of your mouth. And I struggle with it, of course, but I'm always trying to remind myself and always trying to keep that in front of me that the things that I say will manifest. So y', all, that right there, that's the foundation, that is the mindset behind the mission. Now we know what shaped who you are. Let's talk about what you built with it. Coming up next is the play, the bold moves, the tough calls, and the powerful purpose behind Poindexter Consulting Group. We'll be right back.
Hey, we hit that, right? Yeah, perfect.
Hold up. We're just getting started. More truth, more strategy and less bs. Coming up next on Be Better Than your BS right here on Now Media Television.
This is Be Better Than youn BS with Resha Grant. And around here, we get rid of the bs.
Welcome back to Be Better Than youn bs. Want more of what you're watching? Stay connected to Be Better Than youn BS and every NOW Media TV favorite live or on demand, anytime you like. Download the free Now Media TV app on Roku or iOS and unlock non stop bilingual programming in English and Spanish on the move. You can also catch the podcast version right from our website at www.nowmedia tv. From business and news to lifestyle culture, and behind Now Media TV is streaming around the clock. Ready whenever you are. We are back with Vakita Poindexter, CEO of Poindexter Consulting Group. Now let's get into the moves, the risk and the results. Now you say I don't do basic hr. I solve what others can't touch. Can you share a story of what's in your playbook that has solved an issue that.
Almost there. Okay, start over.
Can I do.
Okay, you say I don't do basic hr, I solve what others can't touch. Would you share a story with us of what's in your playbook that has solved an issue that others won't touch?
[00:13:59] Speaker B: Sure. So a lot of other HR professionals will take risk. Right. And so again, you know, being I'm a faith leaper. I'm A risk taker by nature.
I will handle situations where I can eliminate cases from going to court. I can eliminate individuals that feel as though that they need to sue the company for discrimination, wrongful termination, this, that and the other. I create exit strategies for individuals that I can allow them to leave that particular organization still feeling healthy and whole. Right. I don't believe that an individual has to separate a business relationship broken. Right. And we talked about sports originally.
Football is my, is my, my Zen, my relaxation. Right. And so when you look at two teams, right. And you look at the Rams and you look at the Lions, both of those quarterbacks played on opposite teams. They could not win a game.
[00:14:51] Speaker A: Right.
[00:14:52] Speaker B: They switched assignments, switched teams, and both of them almost went to the Super Bowl.
[00:14:56] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:14:57] Speaker B: So not bad people. Just their assignment on that team is over. So I'm able to come in, discern, assess when the assignment is over. How do we create the exit strategy where both company and employee can leave on good terms and what I mean, good terms, not hostile, not, you know, this, that and the other.
So, you know, I got different things in my playbook, as you call it, that could help eliminate that. The other piece is, you know, coaching and developing. Oftentimes, 80% of the problems that are going on in the workplace is not work related. It's this thing called life that people are trying to navigate through. And so leaders, organizations don't take the time, time to really get engaged with their team members. I take that time, you know, let's sit down and have a conversation, what's going on? Because that statement that everybody likes to say is people like to know how much you care before how much you know. And that is the truth.
[00:15:49] Speaker A: Yes, very much so. And you talked about roles. Talk a little bit about how important roles are. Because again, back to sports. If you know your role and you have that and everybody understands what your role is, that's the only way you can really run the play. That's the only way that you can win. Now, every once in a while, the post pair steps out, hits the three pointer and, you know, kills the game. But that's not the norm. So how important are roles in these, in this, in work, in hr?
[00:16:18] Speaker B: Sure. So, you know, let's go back to the sports analogy that you just used. Right. You gotta have a playbook.
[00:16:22] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:16:23] Speaker B: Right. And you gotta educate your team on what the plays are. And so from an HR perspective, you gotta have policies and procedures. You can't hold people accountable and then tell them what they're going to be held Accountable to. So you got to have your policies, you got to have your procedures. You have to be consistent across the board with training and developing, making sure that your employees understand what the policies and procedures are, what's acceptable, what's not acceptable. Everything doesn't have to be punitive.
I think that's a part of the challenge. But you have to be able to educate your team on what those policies and procedures are. You've got to have some basic job description so people know the duties and responsibilities that they're going to be doing. As a leader, you need to be assessing that. You can't wait till you've reached your maximum level of passivity and now you're ready to fire the employee when you haven't coached them or trained them or checked in with them or did an assessment on their performance over the last six, seven, eight months. So you have to strategic put some standard operating policies and procedures in place and then follow up on them. It makes no sense to have that and don't do it.
[00:17:28] Speaker A: Right.
That is so true. And we talked a little bit about this in the last segment, but leadership is scary right now. You know, a lot of people want to be leaders until it gets really hard, because it sounds good, as you said, to be chief of whatever. But what comes with that is a lot of responsibility. And this year we've seen so many things happen, especially in the space of diversity, equity and inclusion.
How can leaders prepare for those difficult conversations emotionally so that they don't get derailed, they don't get defensive, they don't feel guilty. Because I've spoken to a lot of leaders of my clients, huge companies, and that's exactly. They're so worried about this very thing.
[00:18:08] Speaker B: Sure. And you hit it right on the nail. Everybody wants to be in leadership, Everybody wants to be in management. Better pay looks good on the trajectory of the CV or a resume, you know, more benefits. But it's the responsibilities piece that people are missing.
[00:18:23] Speaker A: Right.
[00:18:23] Speaker B: Because I'm a firm believer much is giving, much is required. So when you're giving that role, you are now stepping into a space where the individuals that you are overseeing, leading, managing, guiding, coaching, you are not just a leader. You're a parent, a therapist, a counselor, a priest, a coach.
You are wrapped up into all of that. And these are individuals, these are not square pegs that are going to fit into round holes. So I tell people all the time before you step into leadership, which is a privilege. Right. It is a privilege to step into leadership and be able to speak into People's lives, help them with the trajectory of their particular career path. You got to be able to do your due diligence. You need to know how you communicate, what is your communication style?
How do you receive information? How does your team members receive information?
And so I'm from a different kind of cloth, and maybe it's because I'm more mature, is I understand that we're living in some challenging times, but this is not our first rodeo. Right. It's a test of you as an individual. Do you have the ability to show up, be your real, true, authentic self, take off that mask and help these people overcome whatever obstacle or challenges that they have going on within the workplace and personally. Now, what I mean by that is you're not supposed to solve all their problems, but you got to care enough and know. Care enough to know how to guide them. Right.
To help resolve whatever challenges. Whether it is their assignment here is over. Are they in the right position?
So all of that is a part of that now. The diversity, equity, inclusion, please, piece of it. We have to remember this. There was a season where we didn't even have that.
[00:20:05] Speaker A: Exactly.
[00:20:06] Speaker B: Right?
[00:20:06] Speaker A: Yeah, we didn't have it.
[00:20:08] Speaker B: And so we had to create spaces or had to create seats at the table where that was more inclusive. And so over the last 10 years, there's been legislature that has been passed and advocacy that's been passed. Leaders need to get involved in that as well. So this is a prime time for real leaders to stand up and do the work.
[00:20:28] Speaker A: Exactly.
[00:20:28] Speaker B: Can't get scared. You got to do the work.
[00:20:30] Speaker A: Exactly. That is so true. And I think that's what we're seeing is we're seeing real leaders be separated from people who just want the name.
Because right now, employees want to feel like the things that you say as a leader about this company, they're going to withstand time no matter what, who's in office or no matter what's going on around us. These are the things that we believe in and the things that we say. Now, I always counsel my leaders and my clients to really step into understanding and getting to know their employees.
Is that something that you buy into as well? Because I believe it's hard to coach a team if you don't know anything about the team or anything about the people that are playing on the team. And, you know, I get that. I have 500 people and I'm like, excuse me. I'll say care if it takes you two years and you spend 15 minutes with everybody, it has to happen because you can't coach to success. What, you don't know?
[00:21:24] Speaker B: 100%. 100%. And that's one of the things that we hear all the time. You know, I've got this many, I've got that many. And that's my response. I don't care if you've got a thousand employees. Right. I mean, we have a ton of clients. But one of the things I do as a leader, as the CEO of my organization, is I meet with every single employee before I take them on as a client.
[00:21:43] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:21:44] Speaker B: Because I want to hear from the employees, and that's from the CEO all the way down.
[00:21:50] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:21:50] Speaker B: And I don't care if It's a Fortune 500 company, a company that has 50 employees or have 5,000. I'm meeting with every single one of the employees. I'm not spending hours with them. I can ask two or three questions and be able to grab what I need to be able to grab. You cannot lead, you cannot encourage, you cannot motivate anyone that you don't know. You have to know their style of communication, how do they receive information, how do they process the information?
And communication is critical, especially in this time. We're in this digital world where people are pulling back from having verbal communications. And so one of the things, excuse me, that I always tell any leader or someone that we're promoting into leadership, these are the core basic things that you need to do if you want to be successful as a leader.
[00:22:38] Speaker A: Yeah, I love that. I love that because I try to do the same thing. There is no way around it in order to be successful. Now, you specialize in crisis and you do investigations and deal with lawsuits and all these things. Executive blow ups. What's that first move in your playbook when a crisis hits?
[00:22:58] Speaker B: Tell everybody calm down.
Right.
Excuse me. It is not the end of the world. Right.
And it's challenging sometimes for me because I do it it number one, quite often, and I do it very well.
However, you know, you have the client or the leader or whoever the allegations are against or making the allegations. They're all operating from an emotional perspective.
[00:23:24] Speaker A: Yes, yes.
[00:23:25] Speaker B: And so the one thing that I do is say, okay, let's calm down, everybody. Let's take a deep breath and walk me through what happened. Right. Give me the information.
And so because I'm a firm believer there's three sides to a story, there's the other individuals and then somewhere in the truth. And then my job is to get to the truth. And so I'm always looking for resolution versus the he said, she said. And so I really go through and I prepare myself. Okay, here are the allegations, here's the individuals I need to talk to. You know, here's a preset questions I'm going to ask.
Where I'm going to conduct the interviews is crucial. You know, you can't go into a business and the employee is making the allegations and conduct the interviews. There's.
[00:24:08] Speaker A: Right.
[00:24:09] Speaker B: So there's a formula that I have developed to be able to go through and do my due diligence to investigate, come out with a resolution and to be able to help clients kind of move forward.
[00:24:20] Speaker A: Love it. Okay. All right y', all, we will be right back to teach you more of how this game is played. But before we go, Vakita, where can people connect with you and learn more about your business?
[00:24:30] Speaker B: Sure. So our website is PCGHR.net but I am very active on LinkedIn. So connect with me on LinkedIn if you want to connect with me directly.
[00:24:40] Speaker A: All right, y', all, we'll be right back. Hold up. We're just getting started. More truth, more strategy and less bs. Coming up next on Be Better Than youn BS right here on NOW Media Television.
This is Be Better Than youn BS with Resha Grant. And around here we get rid of the bs.
Welcome back. It is time for the post game where we reflect on the lessons learned and the practical tips that you, the audience can take away to help you boss up. But Vakiya, in that last segment we talked about these blowups and the legal, some of the legal issues. What are some of the things that companies can look, can think about, those small things that end up blowing up that you've seen?
Sorry, gosh, I got tongue tied.
Should I do the whole question over or just can I just ask her to share?
Okay.
In that last segment we talked about some of these executive blow ups, some of the legal issues and things like that. What are some things that companies can think about before those things blow up that you deal with a lot?
[00:25:53] Speaker B: Sure. So first of all, you have warning signs, right. You know, earthquake just doesn't happen out of anywhere. There's warning signs.
And so what companies need to do is don't ignore them.
Make sure that you're addressing the issues. If an employee has a complaint, a common complaint and or concern, address it. And oftentimes we try to ignore the little things thinking that okay, it's just going to go away and that's the worst case scenario because they don't go away, employees will, it'll continue to Build until they turn into this raging volcano. And they do one or two things, and they're either contacting HR with a threaten to sue or they contact an employment law attorney. So you have to be able to deal with the issues. And oftentimes when you deal with them head on, you can de escalate the situation because 80% of the times it's just a lack of communication.
[00:26:43] Speaker A: Right, right. And I've seen it. I've seen it happen so many times. I remember consulting with a client and we had a call with the CEO and leadership, and that's probably the second call. And this guy had found out that another person in the firm, they were roommates. And I guess he had seen his paycheck and realized that for the same job, same amount of experience, he was being paid 20,000 more than he was. When I tell you that whole call, this guy was just going in. Nobody ever spoke to it. Nobody ever said, hey, we will look into this later. I mean, and the guy, out of those three calls, he was super upset. And I told him, I said, you have to address this. You have. He, he needs to understand why there's a $20,000 discrepancy and what is happening with pay equity. But leaders don't like to dig in to some of those things because I think that sometimes in some of those cases, there aren't, There aren't excuses for it. It's just whatever, you know, whatever happened.
[00:27:41] Speaker B: So it is often. Go ahead, let me just address it, if you don't mind. Oftentimes that is the case. Right. And, but also oftentimes a leader just doesn't know how to address it. It, you know, and so they feel as though, okay, it's going to be my fault. Where, you know, that's where you got to put your big boy pants on and be like, it doesn't matter whose fault is, is you are the leader. You are responsible for resolving whatever the challenge is, whether you made the mistake or not. And so leaders have to also understand that, you know, you're human beings too. We understand that you don't get it right all the times, but you got to be willing to address the situation and let's come to resolution. And it may not be the resolution that the employee wants or the resolution that the leader wants, but it's resolving the issue. You cannot resolve what you refuse to address.
[00:28:24] Speaker A: Right.
[00:28:24] Speaker B: You know, listen, this is my personal statement. You cannot heal what you refuse to reveal. And so oftentimes things that are being revealed is allowing the healing process. And that's in work as well.
[00:28:36] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, see, now you preaching Vakita, but how do leaders actually build trust? Because I think that's a, that's a, that's really what we're talking about. One of the reasons that they're not addressing the issues and the employees are not getting their productivity. Morale is low. There's no trust there. So how do, how do leaders step into a culture and build trust?
[00:28:58] Speaker B: Well, first of all, the leaders got to be confident in what they're doing. Right. Because employees can discern and, you know, whether or not the leader has the skill set, the qualifications and, or the confidence to actually be, you know, leading and guiding their particular team. So that's number one. Number two, be authentic and be real. Stop. Don't try to be something that you're not. You tell your team, you know what, I don't know, but we'll figure it out together. That goes a long way instead of pontificating an answer or a response. So be real and be authentic. Check in with your, with your team members. Like with my team, we have a 9 o' clock meeting every. Every Monday at a 4 o' clock meeting every afternoon. I want to check in with you. How are you doing? How's work? How's kids? How's family? How's mom? How's dad? What is it that you need? How can I support you and then follow up on it? And so don't just do things for the sake of doing them. Be real. Be authentic. Care about your people. Right. Because a person will climb the highest mountain for you as long as you know that they got that. As long as they feel as though you got their back, they don't have to know everything. They don't have to be the expert. They will go figure it out if they believe that you trust them.
[00:30:10] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:30:11] Speaker B: And so you have to build that trust. It's a relationship. And so relationships takes time, but you have to cultivate it. You have to cultivate the relationship.
[00:30:21] Speaker A: Yeah. I'm thinking about a person that used to work for me and his mom was dying of cancer in the hospital, but I had no idea. And he hadn't been working for me that long. And I noticed that something was off. And I, you know, I called him in and I said, hey, are you okay? You know, you just seem a little off today. And he shared with me that his mom's in the hospital. And I said, why are you here? And he said, because.
Because I just started here a couple of months ago and I don't feel like I can take off. And I said, get out of here because if that were my mom, I would be at the hospital. He said, I'll work from the hospital. I said, I don't need you to work from the hospital. I just need you to be with your mom during this time.
That guy, every time I see him, I get the biggest hug, you know, he still loves me. He still brings that up. And it's like, you've got to show people that you care about more than what they can do for you. But you humanize them and you say, this is a time where you need to be with family, your job is safe, you're fine. So I love everything that you're saying about checking in with people and understanding. That's one of the things at my farm too, we take mental health days, you know, and that was something that as I had younger employees coming in that said, you know, I need a mental health day, you know, And I think at least my age, Gen X, I was like, mental health day, you know. But then very quickly, very quickly, I'm like, okay, this makes sense. But at first I had to really, I had to process like, you know, what do you mean you need a mental health day? You know.
But anyway, it's important to realize what it is that they need and be open and to making sure that they get it because they're going to work harder for you.
[00:32:01] Speaker B: I think one accountability is a given, you know, especially stepping into leadership. I don't think that.
I think the expectations for leaders are even higher and our accountability is even more because again, we're talking about individuals, we're talking about feelings, we're talking about humans. And when I talk about feelings, you know, let me be real clear because I tell this to leaders all the time.
You're not responsible for how people feel.
[00:32:25] Speaker A: Exactly.
[00:32:25] Speaker B: That's not your job. Right.
But their feelings should count or matter. Right. Even though feelings are subjective. And what I mean by that is what employees narrative is about, you as a leader should be important because we're always a work in progress. We're always a work in progress. And I think we had talked about an individual that you have been working with that you found out his mother was in the hospital with cancer.
[00:32:52] Speaker A: Right.
[00:32:54] Speaker B: And so I think for that particular scenario, I think one thing that leaders need to always be able to understand is you have the opportunity to have a huge impact in somebody's life, regardless if they ever tell you that you have or not your goal or your job as a leader is to be able to get the best out of that particular individual while they're on your, while they're on that assignment with you. Because everything is an assignment. They're not going to retire from the company. That's not the post office. We obviously know that they're not going to retire from the federal government. This is not that kind of scenario.
Your position as a leader and the accountability piece should always be, what is it that I can do to be able to allow this individual to be the best version of themselves today? So when they're off to their next assignment, I have equipped them for success.
They may never come back and thank you. They may never say anything. They may be like that individual that every time he sees you, he gives you a hug because at that season in his life, you were extremely important with the decisions that you make. That should be the mindset of a leader. That is where your accountability comes into place.
[00:34:01] Speaker A: I love that. But let's be real. There are so many leaders that are not there. I mean, most when I, when I go into a company and I do an assessment, how the employees feel versus how the leaders feel is always different. In all of my 27 years. Right. It's always different. And it's really difficult to get leaders to see that this is more than just about this, this company culture of we've got to meet these goals. We're hired to do this job. This is really people first, a people first mentality. How do you get them there in your work?
[00:34:37] Speaker B: Sure. So, you know, one of the things that, you know, I talked about earlier on is you cannot do the job without people.
[00:34:44] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:34:45] Speaker B: Right. And so your people are your greatest asset. And if you don't take time as a leader to educate, train, develop, encourage, motivate, discipline employees, you are never going to be successful as a leader.
[00:34:57] Speaker A: Right.
[00:34:57] Speaker B: That's just point blank period. Oftentimes some individuals that are in leadership roles should not be in, in the role.
[00:35:04] Speaker A: Right There's.
[00:35:07] Speaker B: Right. And that's part of the problem. They should not be in that particular role. Oftentimes people are promoted because they are good performers. They show up, they're dedicated, they're loyal. It is the performers. Just because you perform well does not make you a good leader.
[00:35:22] Speaker A: Right.
[00:35:22] Speaker B: And so oftentimes what I've seen in, in my role is we put people in positions where we've literally set them up to fail because they don't have the skill set, the qualifications, the mindset. They come in there with a limited mindset that it is my way or no way. If you don't like it, then go find somewhere else to work.
[00:35:40] Speaker A: Right.
[00:35:41] Speaker B: And that is what cripples organizations.
And so this is a different time that we're living in with employees. This is not, you know, when I was an employee back in. Well, I'm not going to say when that was, but back then I was not going to date myself.
Well, you just show up and you just do the work and you don't question anybody. No, this is a completely different mentality. Right. You got Gen X's and millennials that they're questioning everything.
[00:36:07] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:36:07] Speaker B: You have intergenerationals. You got baby boomers and Gen X's where you're trying to all get them to mesh well together like it's a melting pot. You can't just tell them anything now. So you have to lead by example. If you want individuals to follow you and your leadership and do everything that you're asking them to do and go over and beyond because they trust you, you have to show up differently as a leader and you have to continuously to evolve. You can't manage and lead like you did 10 years ago.
[00:36:36] Speaker A: That is so true. Thank you so much for that, y'.
[00:36:38] Speaker B: All.
[00:36:39] Speaker A: Up next is a lightning round where we will get to know Vaquita a little better. Hold up. We're just getting started. More truth, more strategy and less bs. Coming up next on Be Better Than youn BS right here on Now Media Television.
This is Be Better Than youn BS with Resha Grant. And around here, we get rid of the bs.
Welcome back to Be Better Than youn bs. Want more of what you're watching? Stay connected to Be Better Than youn BS and every NOW Media TV favorite, live or on demand, anytime you like. Download the free Now Media TV app on Roku or iOS and unlock non stop bilingual programming in English and Spanish on the move. You can also catch the podcast version right from our website at www.nowmedia.tv. from business and news to lifestyle, culture and beyond, now Media TV is streaming around the clock. Ready whenever you are. All right, Vakita, it's time for people to learn more about you, the person behind the success.
So tell me what your personal culture statement is. The vibe you bring in, the impact that you leave behind.
[00:37:48] Speaker B: Sure. So I lead by grace.
I move with grit and I operate in greatness. That is God given, not man approved.
[00:37:56] Speaker A: Hey, I love that.
[00:37:59] Speaker B: I show up with clarity, courage and conviction. I like to create spaces where truth can be spoken in excellence.
[00:38:07] Speaker A: I love that.
What is your go to Power move when you need to get centered fast.
[00:38:16] Speaker B: Well, one is, I'm a huge music person. Right. And so music for me. And I'm real mindful of the words because I've been down that path where I like to beat and didn't listen to the words. I was like, probably should be listening to that.
But my go to song for me that kind of gets me grounded and focused is Won't He do it by Corinne Hawthorne.
[00:38:35] Speaker A: Oh, I listen to that almost every day.
That is my song.
[00:38:40] Speaker B: That is my. It's like, okay, if I. If things are a little off center, because let's be real. Things. Things will get off center. I. I get back focused. I get back realigned. It's kind of like the navigation system. You know, I sit back and I listen to God say, okay, let me recalculate your route. Yeah, recalculate route.
[00:38:59] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:38:59] Speaker B: Because he's never punitive. So I'm trying not to be punitive to myself.
[00:39:03] Speaker A: Yes. And I mean, that is one of those songs that sits in your spirit, you know, as soon as you hear it. And you are so right about some of the other songs. Now, I won't sit here and say I don't love, you know, hip hop and rap and that stuff gets me hyped, too. But there are some lyrics that I hear myself saying that I'm like, ooh, I should not be. That is not something I want to. That I want somebody to hear me singing.
But, you know, so you have to catch it. What's the quote or the mantra that lives in your head rent free?
[00:39:35] Speaker B: The quote of the mantra that lives in my head.
I'm all about grace. Right. So I lead with grace. Walking, power, standing, grit. I never apologize for my anointing. I tell people, don't apologize for your anointing. You were born for greatness.
[00:39:50] Speaker A: Yeah, okay. I love that.
Who's someone who believed in you before you fully believed in yourself?
[00:39:57] Speaker B: My mother.
The reason why I say that is I lost my mom very early in my life. I was 25 years old when my mother passed away of cancer.
I'm an only child, a product of an educator. My mother had her PhD in education, and education wasn't a consideration.
You're going to get it no matter what.
She set the example. She marched with Dr. King.
She went to jail during the civil rights movement. At the time, as a kid, I didn't see the importance of all of that.
[00:40:30] Speaker A: Right.
[00:40:31] Speaker B: You know, but she was instilling values and things into me that later would manifest themselves in the trajectory of my particular career path. And so, you know, I'll never forget this. I said, you know, I used to help her grade papers when, you know, when she started teaching in high school. And I had that red pen, and I was like, I promise you, when I become an adult, I am never teaching school, ever.
Well, I got a call from one of the universities in the Cal State system and asked me if I would come and teach courses. And I was like, wait, what? And so I always say, if you want to make God laugh, tell him what you're not gonna do.
[00:41:06] Speaker A: Exactly.
[00:41:06] Speaker B: And I'll never forget Reisha. You know, after going through my onboarding, I got in that elevator and it was. I was by myself, and I literally broke down in tears because I felt her presence so heavily. And so, you know, she has always, even though she is not physically here with me.
[00:41:23] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:41:24] Speaker B: She has been the one that has walked side by side with me in my decision making. You know, even to this day, I won't do certain things because I know that it wouldn't align with how. How she would want me to be and. Or the opposite. Right.
Advocate for things that you need to advocate for.
[00:41:45] Speaker A: Right.
Yeah. And those things become so important even in the stage that I'm in of thinking of those things that my mom put into me, especially right now, where I need to really pull and access from the inside and access the things that she has told me over and over and over again because I feel like I need them more now than ever. So I get that.
What is one thing that sports has taught you?
[00:42:13] Speaker B: Never give up.
I think that is the biggest thing. Failure is not an option in my book. Right. Delayed does not mean denied. And so I think that is the one thing that sports has taught me that you may not get to the championship this year, but as long as you get up, dust yourself off, and keep it moving, you'll get there.
[00:42:30] Speaker A: Yeah.
Sports always taught me that if you consistently work at it, it can happen, you know, because you have to go in that gym every day, you do the same thing over and over and over again, even to your own point of frustration.
You do all these things to your body, but if you keep shooting, eventually it's going to start going in the goal. And so that's what I would tell myself about entrepreneurship. If I do these things every single day, I'm eventually going to get there. And it paid off. So the boldest move you made in your career. Excuse me. The boldest move that you made in your career that Paid off big.
[00:43:10] Speaker B: I think starting my business was the boldest move because that was at a time in my life where I was broken. Right.
And I still had to navigate. And so I think that was one of the things.
I think the second thing is, literally, as we're speaking, my book has just been released.
[00:43:31] Speaker A: Oh, congratulations.
[00:43:33] Speaker B: Thank you. And so that was a really bold move. Right. I'm ultra private by nature. I mean, I can be going through my own personal, you know, storm. Right.
And nobody would know.
And I just heard God say, you know, I didn't take you through all of this to keep it to yourself. Right. You need to be able to share that so that other individuals know how to get through it. And so I wrote this book, and so. And I put it all out there.
[00:44:01] Speaker A: And so what's the name of the book?
[00:44:04] Speaker B: It's called Brokenness to Breakthrough.
[00:44:06] Speaker A: Okay. And where can we find it?
[00:44:08] Speaker B: It's on Amazon.
[00:44:09] Speaker A: Okay. From Brokenness to Amazon and Breakthrough. Okay. All right. Now if you could prove. Go ahead.
[00:44:16] Speaker B: And so one of the things, too, is my business kind of shifted from that coaching perspective. We're talking about leaders, coaching leaders and C suite leaders. And what I found in my coaching sessions is they had not healed the broken places in their life which was crippling them in their leadership.
[00:44:34] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:44:35] Speaker B: So I was able to use these principles to help them deal with trauma at 2 years old or, you know, trauma that they had experienced through family dynamics. And this was what's causing them not to show up and be the best leader that they needed to be.
[00:44:48] Speaker A: Right.
[00:44:49] Speaker B: So once that was all shifting, I was like, okay, Lord, I see where you're redirecting my path.
And so I'm real thankful for that. I think that was one of the biggest shifts that I'm most proud is helping individuals to heal so that they can be the best version number one of themselves, but as a leader that they can be.
[00:45:05] Speaker A: Right. Because you can only lead from what you've lived if you're not. Especially if you're not open to learning and growing and gaining more knowledge and outside of what you've seen. So I'm interested in reading. I'll pick it up.
[00:45:21] Speaker B: And that's both positive and negative, right? Yes, very true.
If you are not healed in certain areas in your life and you're holding on to stuff, that's going to show up in your leadership for sure. And so that's going to be detrimental to you and the individuals. And so you have to be willing to be the best version of yourself and do the work so that you can show up and be the best leader.
[00:45:43] Speaker A: Yes, that is so true. Now, if you could put one message on a billboard for every woman leader to see, what would it say?
Mm.
[00:45:56] Speaker B: That'S a good one. Let's see.
Anointed, appointed, accepted, approved, and stay aligned. Always moving. Purpose only.
[00:46:09] Speaker A: Okay. All right.
What does winning look like for you now, not just in business, but in life?
[00:46:17] Speaker B: You know, I think winning is something that is continuous. Right.
I'm always striving to be the best version of myself than I was yesterday.
[00:46:29] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:46:29] Speaker B: And so I'm not there yet.
And so I've had championships, but I'm not. I'm not. I'm not done yet.
I like what, you know, one of my favorite songs that says, he's not done with me yet.
And so I feel like I'm just now hitting my stride. Right. I think I talk to my children and other individuals that are really close to me. And again, my circle is very small. Is. You know, you talked about being.
I think you said Gen X, and I'm real authentic with my. I just turned 60 this year, and so I.
[00:47:07] Speaker A: Killing 60. First of all, let me just say, you are killing 60.
[00:47:13] Speaker B: Thank you. I feel like I have just hit my stride, and I'm so super excited for all that God has in store for me and how I can be able to bring other people to fulfill their vision and their mission and their calling as well. So winning, not quite there yet.
The awards, the accolades, all of that says, yes, I've won where I am, because humility for me is crucial. I haven't. I'm not there yet.
[00:47:42] Speaker A: Right.
[00:47:42] Speaker B: I will win and consider it. Have won when my assignment is over.
[00:47:48] Speaker A: So what do you think is next?
With all of. All of the great things that you've already done? Do you have any idea what. What that next chapter looks like for you?
[00:47:59] Speaker B: You know, I just. You know, one of the things I like to do is I like to bring other people along.
I like to help people achieve their dreams, their goals, their vision, their missions. Right. I love mentoring individuals that says, hey, you know, I want to jump into entrepreneurship. I give you a perfect example. I was literally laying off an employee last week, and it was devastating. It was devastating for this particular employee.
But I said, you have attributes that I think would be good as a business owner, and you could do X, Y, and Z, and I'm willing to mentor you if you're willing.
And that employee was like, are you kidding me, Raylan? Like, I've never been fired with a job with an opportunity.
[00:48:36] Speaker A: Right, Right.
[00:48:38] Speaker B: And I literally said, is this something that you're open to? And they said, yeah. I said, fine. Here's how I'm gonna help you, because I'm gonna make an investment into you. Right? I'm gonna pay for your LLC to get started. So if you're serious, let's go get it done, and then I will walk you through that process.
[00:48:53] Speaker A: That is amazing. That is amazing. So y' all have been handed the Playbit Playbook, but, Vakita, before we go, tell us one more time where people can learn about your business.
[00:49:03] Speaker B: Sure. So you can find me on LinkedIn. I am highly engaged on LinkedIn, but my website for the business is PCGH.
[00:49:11] Speaker A: All right, y'. All. That was a masterclass in backbone, brilliance, and bold leadership. Vaquita reminded us that leadership isn't about titles. It's about showing up with strength when the stakes are high. She's not just out here running hr. She's out here protecting businesses, building leaders, and making sure the room stays accountable. If you take nothing else from this conversation, take this. Real leadership is measured in the moments nobody else wants to touch.
That's where the game changers live. So ask yourself, when the pressure hits, are you gonna fold or stand firm? I know what Vakita would do. She'd handle it. Vakita, thank you so much for joining us for this powerful conversation. If you loved it, make sure you tap in, subscribe and share this episode with somebody who needs to lead with more courage and less fe.
